What's in a Girl Crush?

In a recent issue of W magazine, Thessaly La Force explored the idea of a "girl crush." A girl crush is when a girl adores another woman from afar and, supposedly part of her would like to be her.

La Force writes: "The 'girl crush' might sound silly, but sometimes it takes something unserious to get us talking about a serious subject - the ambitions of young creative women and the need for worthy role models."

The author goes on to name her own girl crushes: Zadie Smith, Joan Didion, Patti Smith, Sofia Coppola and Tina Fey. Moreover, in the back index of W magazine, "five highly qualified candidates" are suggested "for you platonic devotion." This list includes: Jennifer Egan, Beyonce, Mindy Kaling, Phoebe Philo and Rachel Maddow. Underneath the photos of these selceted ladies, a brief biography is provided. Some of the names were recognizable, but others made me scratch my head ... Have I been missing out on some potential crush material?

As the article continues, a quote by F. Scott Fitzgerald is mentioned. Written in 1930, he stated: "Crushes' were once a boarding-school phenomenon - now any sort of courageous individualism makes a woman the center of a cult ... What effect has this woman worship on the young girl herself?"

That's a great question, Mr. Fitzgerald. The author took Fitzgerald's question to heart and created this website: Girlcrushzine.tumblr.com. La Force argues that "girl crushing" is a positive trend.

La Force writes: "After two months, we had dozens and dozens of submissions—more than either of us had anticipated. Had we struck a chord? I can’t help but believe our current generation’s embrace of girl crushing signifies something larger: evidence that a professional world once dominated by men has evened out—maybe not totally, but to a reassuring degree. When ­Didion first set out to become a writer, she copied the sentences of Ernest Hemingway; today, my friends and I copy hers."

Girlcrushzine includes personal essays on her website by noteworthy ladies such as Jennifer Egan, Starlee Line, Amanda Fortini and Mary H.K. Choi. Choi is quoted, saying, "a girl crush is a creatively inspiring friendship born of mutual respect and admiration."

Jennifer Egan states: "[The girl crush] represents that moment in girlhood before boys have entered the picture."

The article got me thinking about my "crushes" on various females. Like most crushes, they changed over time and sometimes fizzled as I grew up and as my path has evolved. I started to think about my own history of "girl crushing."

Before I could come up with a list, I had to think about what qualities the girl or woman would have to have in order for me to categorize her as a "girl crush" and not just a girl that I liked.


I guess the basic criteria are that the girl has to have a talent, a look, a career, or a passion that I could deeply appreciate or that I wished to emulate in my own life at the time of the crush. Below is a brief outline of my girl crushes over the years. For the most part, these girl crushes have provided me with inspiration and enlarged my imagination.

1. Annie - Yes, Little orphan Annie. I wanted to BE HER.

2. Natty Gann - from the Walt Disney Movie, The Journey of Natty Gann.

3. Mary Lou Retton - gymnastics champion

4. Nadia Comaneci - gymnastics champion

5. Whitney Houston - (Pre-1990). The first artist I saw live at the Forum in Los Angeles.

4. Joni Mitchell - lyrical and creative inspiration

5. Stella Tennant - super model with four children, and environmental advocate

5. Diane Ronnau - CBS News Producer, family friend, and professional role model.

6. Gina De Palma - Babbo Pastry Chef

7. Salena Roberts - New York Times Sports Reporter

8. Debbie Stoller - feminist, Zine creator, Co-founder of Bust Magazine

9. Ina May Gaskin - Midwife, author of Spiritual Midwifery

10. Corina Wolfer - Natural birth center registered nurse who inspired me to go to nursing school.

10. Stevie Nicks - see this link.

11. Jen Altman - photographer, blogger, mother, cook, music lover ... Need I say More?